suryoyo
17/12/2007, 17:31
Men and Women
NICKNAMES
If Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle. But if Mike Phil, Rob and Jack go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Scrappy
EATING OUT
And when the check comes, Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack will each throw in a $20 bill, even though the total bill is only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their check, out come the pocket calculators
BATHROOMS
A man has five items in his bathroom - a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor,a bar of Dial soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items
GROCERIES
A woman makes a list of things she needs and then goes out to the store and buys these things. A man waits till the only items left in his fridge are half a lime and a soda. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good. By the time a man reaches the checkout counter, his cart is packed tighter than the Clampett's car on Beverly Hillbillies. Of course, this will not stop him from going to the 10 items-or- less lane
ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
SHOES
When preparing for work, a woman will put on a Mondi wool suit, then slip on Reebok sneakers. She will carry her dress shoes in a plastic bags from saks. When a woman gets to work, she will put on her dress
shoes. Five minutes later, she will kick them off because her feet are under the desk. A man will wear the same pair of shoes all day
DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to: go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail. A man will dress upfor: weddings, funerals
LAUNDRY
Women do laundry every couple of days. A man will wear every article of clothing he owns, including his surgical pants that were hip about twenty years ago, before he will do his laundry. When he is finally
out of clothes, he will wear a dirty sweatshirt inside out, rent a U-Haul and take his mountain of clothes to the Laundromat. Men always expect to meet beautiful women at the Laundromat
OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dental appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man
is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house
:D Just for Fun
NICKNAMES
If Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle. But if Mike Phil, Rob and Jack go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Scrappy
EATING OUT
And when the check comes, Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack will each throw in a $20 bill, even though the total bill is only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their check, out come the pocket calculators
BATHROOMS
A man has five items in his bathroom - a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor,a bar of Dial soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items
GROCERIES
A woman makes a list of things she needs and then goes out to the store and buys these things. A man waits till the only items left in his fridge are half a lime and a soda. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good. By the time a man reaches the checkout counter, his cart is packed tighter than the Clampett's car on Beverly Hillbillies. Of course, this will not stop him from going to the 10 items-or- less lane
ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument
SHOES
When preparing for work, a woman will put on a Mondi wool suit, then slip on Reebok sneakers. She will carry her dress shoes in a plastic bags from saks. When a woman gets to work, she will put on her dress
shoes. Five minutes later, she will kick them off because her feet are under the desk. A man will wear the same pair of shoes all day
DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to: go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail. A man will dress upfor: weddings, funerals
LAUNDRY
Women do laundry every couple of days. A man will wear every article of clothing he owns, including his surgical pants that were hip about twenty years ago, before he will do his laundry. When he is finally
out of clothes, he will wear a dirty sweatshirt inside out, rent a U-Haul and take his mountain of clothes to the Laundromat. Men always expect to meet beautiful women at the Laundromat
OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dental appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man
is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house
:D Just for Fun